How to minimise exam stress

The most important thing to recognise as a parent during exam season is that you can’t make stress go away, however much you’d like to. Instead of focusing on how to get rid of stress, there are many ways you can help your child to minimise it.

Encourage a balanced routine, physical exercise and sleep schedule

• A reliable routine allows our brains to enter a safe state, preserving energy and giving us a sense of normality during times of change or stress. Providing a varied schedule of school, hobbies, revision and down-time gives students different directions of concentration so their sole focus isn’t just their exams. Integrating physical exercise into this routine allows their bodies to keep moving, reducing the chance of tension-related shoulder or neck pain. Regulated and consistent sleep not only improves students’ memory retention and concentration, but also encourages improved moods and mental health.

Talking

• Maintaining an open dialogue with your child about their worries, hopes and commitments is vital throughout exam season. The hours spent focused and studying in their room can be isolating. Remind your child that they are not alone in this process and that, whilst you can’t sit the exam for them, you are behind them no matter what. Maybe discuss your own experiences with stress and pressure; letting them know that you also go through the same feelings as them can decrease their sense of isolation.

Get practical

• To combat the mental overwhelm of studying, encourage your child to utilise tactile and practical revision methods. Activities such as making mindmaps, flashcards or diagrams can help to reduce mental overwhelm, providing visual aids as well. You can also offer to go over a topic with your teen, or even simply ask if and how they would like you to get involved. Sometimes just having an extra person involved can make revision seem less daunting.  

How to manage stress during the exam

Exam stress is extremely common, especially in the moments leading up to opening the paper. The initial moments where students find out which questions face them can be some of the most intense during the entire exam diet, so discussing ways to manage their stress while sitting the exam can be essential.

• Breathing techniques: 
  • 4, 4, 8 = inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds and then exhale for 8 seconds until all the air has been released. This technique activates the parasympathetic nervous system, lowering cortisol levels (the primary stress hormone). By focussing on breathing, students can increase their mental clarity and re-regulate themselves.
• Focussing on the senses
  • 54321 method = find 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell and 1 you can taste. This technique brings focus back to the present moment, back to our bodies during times of mental confusion or overwhelm. Taking even 1 minute to re-centre themselves in the exam will be more effective than trudging on through panic or brain fog.
  • Stroking your hands = self-soothing is often an unconscious action we use to lower our stress levels. Movements such as twitching or shifting in a seat often signals a physical manifestation of anxiety. These calming techniques reduces the effect of the adrenaline released when we experience stress, returning the nervous system back to a balanced state.
• Grounding techniques:
  
  • If students come across a difficult question in an exam, it can be easy to get overwhelmed and caught up in their thoughts trying to solve it. Using techniques to ground themselves and return to the present moment can re-establish a state of calm and focus. Small actions such as wriggling their toes can return students to the here and now, refocussing their attention on the task at hand.
• Move the body
  • During periods of anxiety, our bodies tense up in a ‘fight-or-flight’ reaction. Rolling their shoulders or stretching their legs beneath their desk can help students to release this tension and loosen their muscles, reducing discomfort. 

Supporting after

The immediate aftermath of an exam can be a strange time: students can experience a plethora of emotions, from relief to joy to disappointment. Navigating this time can be tricky as a parent, so here are some of the best ways that you can support your child once they leave the exam hall. It’s natural that you will want to ask them how it went, but try to let them lead the discussion. Some teenagers might want to talk about it straight away but others might just want some space to process everything, so try to manage your expectations. Moreover, try to avoid analysing the paper, investigating what they did or didn’t do. Most students will already be going over their answers in their head from the second the exam is finished, so instead, focus on their effort and remember that a simple “I’m proud of you” can go a long way. Planning something to do together afterwards can help them to decompress before the next exam. One of the hardest things students need to do is letting go of one exam so that they can effectively move onto the next, so non-academic activities can be a great way to help your child reset.

How to help with motivation 

The exam diet lasts for an average of 6 weeks, so it’s no wonder that motivation can take a few hits along the way. Some students can have weeks in between their exams, whereas others can have quick turnarounds between contrasting subjects. A balanced and encouraging environment at home is essential to help maintain motivation during this time. One effective approach is to plan something enjoyable as a family, giving your teenager something to look forward to–whether it's a small break from their revision or a treat after exams are over. Your celebration of their hard work, resilience and dedication can also help to build their confidence and reduce a sense of pressure. By offering small rewards after each exam, as well as a larger one once exams are over, you teach your child delayed gratification and encourage them to keep going. Whilst a structured routine of consistent revision is essential to achieving their goals, ensure that they have some regular downtime, as rest is a vital part of study, recharging their energy and focus. Finally, you can provide gentle reminders of the goals they have set for themselves and the aspirations they have, helping them to stay grounded and concentrated without adding unnecessary pressure.

Tips for you

• Don’t worry if they’re stressed:
  • Stress is a natural reaction and shows that they fundamentally care about the outcome. It doesn't necessarily mean they will be overwhelmed, and can even be a motivator and improve performance. It is simply a part of this new challenge. 
• Understand that they want to do well:
  • It’s very rare that students actively want to do badly in their exams. Even if their style of revision doesn’t align with your expectations or your own methods, they’re discovering what works for them. It may not be visible in ways you’re used to, but that doesn’t mean that effort isn’t there. 
• Try to avoid telling them to do more and work harder: 
  • Unnecessary pressure only brings tension and conflict. Whilst it comes from a place of care, such conversations can make students feel criticised, reducing their willingness to engage in their studies as they feel they can’t do it correctly. Trusting their agency and independence during this time can be far more effective.
• Remember how you felt when sitting your exam:
  
  • Put yourself in their shoes and remember what it was like to sit school exams. Sometimes it’s good to remind yourself of what they are going through, as it helps you to respond calmly rather than reactively. 
• Behave how you want them to behave and never assume you know how they are feeling:
  
  • Staying calm and respectful in your own reaction sets the tone for how they can move through this experience. Every student goes through exam season differently so keep your communication open, listen without judgement and allow them to talk freely and express themselves in their way. 

⭐️ Exam stress is normal, so you can help most by reassuring your child, focusing on effort over perfection, and keeping the bigger life perspective in mind.

⭐️ Practical preparation and calm routines—before, during, and after exams—can reduce anxiety and help students perform at their best.

⭐️ Support, encouragement, and realistic expectations play a key role in helping teenagers stay motivated, manage stress, and move forward confidently regardless of results.